As many of you know the last year has been horrific (understatement). It was about a year ago, now, that they found a large mass by my right kidney. It wouldn’t be until the day before Thanksgiving that we would find out that it was a desmoplastic small round cell tumor-sarcoma. This began the process of an absolute nightmare (7 mos. of the hardest core chemo you can get, major side effects to the chemo [still have some], and major surgery [removed the tumor, my rt. kidney, and reconstructed my IVC [Inferior Vena Cava]), and now I sit here typing this “cancer-free!” (you can read about my ordeal here )

About the same time I was diagnosed, the “Imonk” (aka. Michael Spencer) was diagonosed with stage 4 colon cancer (metatastic); he went home to be with the Lord, I believe it was in April. Before Imonk or me were diagnosed a woman my mom knows (she works with and is supervisor to this woman’s husband) — her name is Carolyn — was also diagnosed with cancer (lymphoma [non-hodgkins]). She went through months of different chemos, she eventually had a T-cell transplant, which was torturous for her; with the hopes that that would do it. They had to wait a couple of months after the transplant to see if it worked, it didn’t! She struggled and fought hard, I was just on the phone with my mom tonight (my mom is really good friends with Carolyn’s sister-in-law), she had emailed earlier and said that it looked like today might be the day. Carolyn’s blood pressure was extremely low this morning (Wednesday the 13th), and her limbs were purple; hospice said these were signs of imminent death. She had her family around her, but she didn’t want it to be like that. She came back, her blood pressure rose and her limbs returned to a normal color; she said she wasn’t ready to die, that she’s not going to die!!! I was just talking to my mom about all of this around 9.30pm tonight, we talked about the Lord, and death, suffering and eternity. We hung up, at around 10.30pm; she called me back at around 11.25pm, Carolyn went home as we were talking about her, and the glories that she stood just upon the cusp of in her misery and pain.

I am reminded of what Jesus said:

. . . I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, 26. and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this? ~John 11.25,26

Carolyn believes in Him . . . she didn’t die! She moved from this earthly vessel into her heavenly vessel. Her mortality just put on immortality. Her perishable just put on the imperishable. The Lord Jesus stood up and welcomed His little sheep into His great and comforting Shepherd’s arms, He brought her to the still waters, He restored Her soul; He says to her, ‘even though you walked through the valley of the shadow of death’ all it was was was the shadow side of My cross, there’s no more death, crying, pain or suffering where you are now. Carolyn says in response to her Lord, ‘As the deer pants for the waters brook, so my soul pants for you, dear Lord! Jesus is saying to her, ‘drink of the waters of life, freely; freely I have received, freely I have given to you an eternal kingdom to rule and reign with me where I am its Temple, I am its Sunshine, I am its Life!

What an amazing thing to contemplate. Death has no sting, but it still hurts. Tonight was Carolyn’s night, we all have that night; we all have that hour of darkness to participate in. But for the joy set before us, we will make it; just like Carolyn did tonight. Good night, Carolyn!

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